don't

Just... don't do it.
Because you know me so well and you know that it would hurt me. Because this always hurts me. So, so badly...

You thought of asking me how I feel about this? Well, don't. Because I would tell you that's it's ok. And it's not. It will never be. And I can't tell you more then this... How can I explain why I feel pain when a knife is entering my flash? I just do... this is the way I am. Maybe I shouldn't be this way, but I am, damn it! And I am so, so sorry for that... I don't know what I can say more... And you know me so well...

Or maybe I am wrong. Maybe you don't know me at all. Maybe you never did. Maybe it was all in my head, nothing real, just another fool's dream... Because if you do know me, you wouldn't do such a thing, would you?... Of course you wouldn't, because this would be just evil.

In the end, this seems simple... is it?... Because I am sure you know me. Because I am sure you are loving and so kind. And not doing it wouldn't hurt you or make much of a difference for you, but doing it would hurt me. It would crash a piece of me. A very shy piece that needs care to flourish. A piece that you used to love and maybe you will again, a piece that I need...

So, just don't...please...


[Later Update] Well... you did it! How could have I have been so naive to even hope otherwise?!... Well, my naive wonderland is amazingly beautiful, except when reality shits all over it... Thank you, sir, may I have another one, please?!